rewriting the rules an integrative guide to love sex and relationships

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Rewriting The Rules

Author : Meg John Barker
ISBN : 9781351699730
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 69. 76 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Docs
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We live in a time of uncertainty about relationships. We search for The One but find ourselves staying single because nobody measures up. We long for a happily-ever-after but break-up after break-up leave us bruised and confused. Rewriting the Rules: An Anti Self-Help Guide to Love, Sex and Relationships is a friendly guide through the complicated - and often contradictory - advice that's given about sex and gender, monogamy and conflict, break-up and commitment. It asks questions about the rules of love, such as which to choose from all the rules on offer? Do we stick to the old rules we learnt growing up, or do we try something new and risk being out on our own? And what about the times when the rules we love by seem to make things worse, rather than better? This new edition, updated throughout, considers how the rules are being 'rewritten' in various ways - for example in monogamish and polyamorous relationships, different ways of understanding sex and gender, and new ideas for managing commitment and break-up where economics, communities, or child-care make complete separation impossible. This book considers how the rules are being ‘rewritten’ in various ways, giving you the power to find an approach that best fits your situation.

Rewriting The Rules

Author : Meg Barker
ISBN : 9780415517621
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 66. 73 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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We live in a time of great uncertainty about relationships. We search for "The One," but find ourselves staying single because nobody measures up. The reality of our relationships is not what we expected, and it becomes hard to balance it with all the other things that we want out of life. At the same time that marriage shows itself to be the one 'recession proof' industry; the rates of separation and break-up soar ever higher. Rewriting the Rules is a friendly guide through the complicated - and often contradictory - rules of love: the advice that is given about attraction and sex, monogamy and conflict, gender and commitment. It asks questions such as: which to choose from all the rules on offer? Do we stick to the old rules we learnt growing up, or do we try something new and risk being out on our own? This book considers how the rules are being 'rewritten' in various ways, for example the 'new monogamy', alternative commitment ceremonies, different ways of understanding gender, and new ideas for managing conflict and break-up where economics and child-care make complete separation a problem. In this way Rewriting the Rules gives the power to the reader to find the approach which fits their situation.

Rewriting The Rules

Author :
ISBN : 9781136223679
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 75. 20 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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We live in a time of great uncertainty about relationships. We search for "The One," but find ourselves staying single because nobody measures up. The reality of our relationships is not what we expected, and it becomes hard to balance it with all the other things that we want out of life. At the same time that marriage shows itself to be the one 'recession proof' industry; the rates of separation and break-up soar ever higher. Rewriting the Rules is a friendly guide through the complicated - and often contradictory - rules of love: the advice that is given about attraction and sex, monogamy and conflict, gender and commitment. It asks questions such as: which to choose from all the rules on offer? Do we stick to the old rules we learnt growing up, or do we try something new and risk being out on our own? This book considers how the rules are being 'rewritten' in various ways, for example the 'new monogamy', alternative commitment ceremonies, different ways of understanding gender, and new ideas for managing conflict and break-up where economics and child-care make complete separation a problem. In this way Rewriting the Rules gives the power to the reader to find the approach which fits their situation.

Sexuality And Gender For Mental Health Professionals

Author : Christina Richards
ISBN : 9781446293133
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 27. 68 MB
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Questions of sexuality and gender affect everyone and therefore have an inevitable relevance in the consulting room. Yet with interpretations and manifestations of both varying greatly from person to person, understanding the inherent complexities of sexuality and gender can be a daunting task for the health professional. Breaking down these complexities this practical guide familiarises the reader with all of the common and many of the less common sexualities, genders and relationship forms, and explains experiences and issues relating to each. The book contains: -Explanations of various forms of sexuality, gender and relationship structures -Common concerns relating to specific groups -Key practises relating to specific groups -The treatment of specific groups in contemporary Western society -Details of some rules and ideals that are commonly found within specific groups -Suggestions for professional practice with these groups Ideal for all members of the multidisciplinary team, this accessible book is relevant to practitioners across theoretical backgrounds. Whether you are a trainee or qualified psychotherapist, counsellor, nurse, medic, psychiatrist, social worker or applied psychologist, this is a vital text for your professional practice. CHRISTINA RICHARDS is Senior Specialist Psychology Associate at the West London Mental Health NHS Trust (Charing Cross) Gender Identity Clinic. MEG BARKER is a senior lecturer in psychology at the Open University and a sex and relationship therapist.

The Sex Diaries

Author : Bettina Arndt
ISBN : 9780522855555
Genre : Interpersonal relations
File Size : 71. 12 MB
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'From the time I started working as a sex therapist back in the early 1970s, people have been talking to me about their sex lives. What I hear about most is the business of negotiating the sex supply. How do couples deal with the strain of the man wishing and hoping while all she longs for is the bliss of uninterrupted sleep?' In The Sex Diaries Australia's leading sex therapist, Bettina Arndt, uncovers the night-time drama being played out in bedrooms everywhere the creeping hand and feigning of sleep, the staying up late in the hope that he will doze off. It is one of the great inconvenient truths of relationships that after the first blissful years together, most men want more sex than their female partners. Bettina Arndt recruited ninety-eight couples to keep diaries, revealing their intimate negotiations over sex. Who feels like having sex? Who doesn't? And how do couples cope if one person wants it more than the other? She draws on her thirty-five years of experience as a sex therapist and psychologist to provide a provocative analysis that challenges our basic assumptions about sex. With her characteristic humour and insight, Bettina Arndt proposes a new approach to how couples can enjoy regular sex and sustain loving relationships.

The Secrets Of Enduring Love

Author : Meg John Barker
ISBN : 9781473528086
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 46. 17 MB
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The Secrets of Enduring Love focuses on what couples actually do to maintain, nurture and nourish their relationships. The reader will be taken on a journey through different ways of doing relationships, focusing on the key themes which came out of the research: everyday acts of kindness and appreciation; the importance of home; communication and conflict management; sex and intimacy; incorporating others into the relationship (children, pets, friends, hobbies); and telling your own love story. One of the key messages from the research is that different things work for different people, and at different times in the relationship. For this reason the book focuses on the differnt practices that we might bring into our own relationships, helping us to recognise the small things which we may be already doing but which ordinarily go by unnoticed, and offering a helping hand to find out what works best for us.

Opening Love

Author : Dr. Anya
ISBN : 9781782799511
Genre : Body, Mind & Spirit
File Size : 35. 64 MB
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Love, sex, and relationship wisdom from the polyamory movement are offered in this practical guide to spiritual enlightenment. Contrary to popular belief, monogamy and celibacy are not the only two options for exploring a spiritual path. In Opening Love, Dr. Anya translates the lessons learned by the pioneers of the polyamory (many loves) movement for readers who actively pursue personal growth through spiritual practice. Drawing on both personal experience and philosophical reflection, this nonfiction guide explains how to cultivate intentional, creative, non-conventional relationships that center on principles of honesty and consent. Instead of committing solely to a single person, spiritual seekers can instead commit to pursuing openness and courage in all their interactions. As polyamorists understand: love, sex, and relationships are not scarce commodities, rather they are an abundant resource for healing and evolving one's consciousness. With eloquence and precision, Dr. Anya describes how to cultivate compersion (the opposite of jealousy), find an intentional community based on common core values, and build advanced emotional and communication skills. Meditation and reflection practices are offered throughout, to create an interactive, truly transformative learning experience.

Understanding Non Monogamies

Author : Meg Barker
ISBN : 9781135196295
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 37. 97 MB
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Most social scientific work on intimate relationships has assumed a monogamous structure, or has considered anything other than monogamy only in the context of 'infidelity'. Yet, in recent years there has been a growing interest among researchers and the public in exploring various patterns of intimacy that involve open non-monogamy. This volume gathers contributions from academics, activists, and practitioners throughout the world to explore non-monogamous relationships. Featuring both empirical and theoretical pieces, contributors examine the history and cultural basis of various forms of non-monogamy, experiences of non-monogamous living, psychological understandings of relationship patterns, language and emotion, the discursive construction of mono-normativity as well as issues of race, class, disability, sexuality and gender. This volume will be of interest to academics and practitioners working in the social sciences and anyone who is seeking greater insight into the intricacies of non-monogamous relationships.

The Rules Tm

Author : Ellen Fein
ISBN : 9780759524897
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 83. 99 MB
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You are a creature unlike any other (Rule #1)--that's why you need . . . The Rules. A simple set of dos and don'ts, The Rules will lead you to where you want to be: in a healthy, committed relationship. Unlike today's haphazard dating customs, The Rules recognizes certain facts of life. That men know what they want. That a man is either attracted to you--or not! That men want a challenge, not an instant or easy victory. When you follow these commonsense guidelines, you treat yourself with respect and dignity--and demand that men do likewise. Although they sound old-fashioned ("Don't see him more than once or twice a week"), they encourage you to lead a full, satisfying, busy life--outside of romance. Although they seem tough ("Don't talk to a man first"), they will teach you how to accept occasional defeat and move on. And although they require discipline ("No more than casual kissing on the first date"), they will bring out the best in you and in the men you date. The goal? Marriage, in the shortest time possible, to a man you love, who loves you even more than you love him.

The Couple And Family Technology Framework

Author : Katherine M. Hertlein
ISBN : 9781136175732
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 61. 62 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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Couples and families worldwide have a constant electronic connection to others, a fact that is influencing the concerns and issues they bring to therapy. The authors of this resource help mental health practitioners to better deal with concerns such as online infidelity, online dating, internet addictions, cyber bulling, and many more by introducing the Couple and Family Technology (CFT) framework, a multi-theoretical approach that doesn’t require clinicians to change their preferred clinical approach. The CFT framework acknowledges the ways in which couples navigate their relationship with technology and a partner simultaneously, and it attends to, and in some cases incorporates the role of technology in therapeutic ways. Included in the authors’ discussion of how different technologies affect relationships is • a survey of what individuals’ motivations of usage are • an examination of the specific issues that emerge in treatment • a study of the risks particularly relevant to intimate relationships, and • an introduction of the first-ever technology-based genogram. They also examine technological usage across different developmental points in a couple’s lifespan, with attention given throughout to people from various cultural backgrounds. Along with the CFT framework, the authors also introduce a new discipline of family research: Couple and Family Technology. This discipline integrates three broad perspectives in family science and helps therapists maintain a systemic focus in assessing and treating couples where issues of the Internet and new media are problematic. Online resources can be accessed by purchasers of the book and include videos, additional case studies, glossary, and forms.

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