moms who drink and swear true tales of loving my kids while losing my mind

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Moms Who Drink And Swear

Author : Nicole Knepper
ISBN : 9781101650943
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 39. 55 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

What The F Should I Make For Dinner

Author : Zach Golden
ISBN : 9780762443673
Genre : Cooking
File Size : 90. 6 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Don't know what to make for dinner? Is every evening an occasion for duress and deliberation? No more! What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner? gets everyone off their a**es and in the kitchen. Derived from the incredibly popular website, whatthefuckshouldimakefordinner.com, the book functions like a “Choose your own adventure” cookbook, with options on each page for another f*@#ing idea for dinner. With 50 recipes to choose from, guided by affrontingly creative navigational prompts, both meat-eaters and vegetarians can get cooking and leave their indecisive selves behind.

Confessions Of A Scary Mommy

Author : Jill Smokler
ISBN : 9781451673777
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 46. 75 MB
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An irreverent assessment of the dark side of parenting combines original essays and anonymous confessions as posted on the ScaryMommy.com site to encourage women to embrace their own parenting approaches without competing with other moms who only seem to have everything under control.

W H Ine

Author : Jennifer Todryk
ISBN : 9781631063350
Genre : Cooking
File Size : 75. 44 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Docs
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This isn't your ordinary wine pairing book--this is wine pairing for the weary parent! Did your daughter just get out of bed for the twelfth time to ask for a glass of water? We've got the perfect ros� for your sanity. Did your son just have a meltdown in the middle of the grocery store? We've got a Pinot for your pain. Has your child's math homework left you in a state of total depression? Try a Syrah to get you out of that funk. W(h)ine includes fifty perfect pairings to match your child's perfectly rotten behavior! You'll also discover the best ways to open a wine bottle without a corkscrew (hint: use a shoe). As a bonus, each wine featured in the book comes with a sticker, so every time you sample a wine to match a rotten behavior, go ahead and add it to the Periodic Table of W(h)ine that folds out of the book. The sticker groupings will help you determine if your child has behavior problems, attitude problems, or just plain bad DNA! So whether you like your "juice" from the glass, the bottle, or the box, this is the perfect book to wine your way through the joys of day-to-day parenting.

How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids

Author : Jancee Dunn
ISBN : 9780316267113
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 30. 95 MB
Format : PDF
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"Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself." --People Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in SlateFeatured in People Picks A Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of 2017 A hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice. How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper? Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate--and rebuild--your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children. Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.

Mother Can You Not

Author : Kate Friedman
ISBN : 9780283072611
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 54. 76 MB
Format : PDF, Docs
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'Happy birthday, spawn. Welcome to the wrong side of twenty-five. The expiration date on your eggs is officially in sight. Tick tock. Love, Mom' This was the text message Kate Friedman woke up to on the morning of her twenty-sixth birthday, but her mother's maternal adoration and helicopter parenting began while Kate was still in utero. Never shy about pushing her only daughter to study harder, to dump her loser boyfriends, to move to 'less rapey' neighbourhoods, Kate's mum has given some truly hilarious but often sage advice over the years. It wasn't until Kate began sharing her mother's messages online that she realized quite how many people would find her mother as hysterical as she does. Over, 700,000 people follow @CrazyJewishMom on Instagram, and this side-splittingly funny mother-daughter duo has been featured in media around the world. From taking Kate to buy her first bra at a speciality drag-queen shop, to stalking a Princeton admissions officer across state lines, to posing as her daughter on multiple dating sites, Mother, Can You Not? is Kate's brilliantly funny and affectionate story of life with her fabulous, eccentric mother.

Hard To Die

Author : Andra Watkins
ISBN : 0990859371
Genre : Future life
File Size : 23. 31 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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Nowhere Series Book 1 An inventive new take on the uncharted fate of Theodosia Burr Alston, the fiery daughter of Alexander Hamilton's murderer Aaron Burr, and subject of "Dear Theodosia" in the Tony Award-winning Broadway musical, Hamilton. This speculative fiction time-warp combines elements of history, the paranormal, and suspense to breathe fresh air into Theodosia's forgotten life and story. By the New York Times best-selling author of Not Without My Father.

The Absolutely True Diary Of A Part Time Indian

Author : Sherman Alexie
ISBN : 9780316219303
Genre : Young Adult Fiction
File Size : 44. 89 MB
Format : PDF
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Bestselling author Sherman Alexie tells the story of Junior, a budding cartoonist growing up on the Spokane Indian Reservation. Determined to take his future into his own hands, Junior leaves his troubled school on the rez to attend an all-white farm town high school where the only other Indian is the school mascot. Heartbreaking, funny, and beautifully written, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian, which is based on the author's own experiences, coupled with poignant drawings by Ellen Forney that reflect the character's art, chronicles the contemporary adolescence of one Native American boy as he attempts to break away from the life he was destined to live. With a forward by Markus Zusak, interviews with Sherman Alexie and Ellen Forney, and four-color interior art throughout, this edition is perfect for fans and collectors alike.

Sh Tty Mom For All Seasons

Author : Alicia Ybarbo
ISBN : 9781613127193
Genre : Humor
File Size : 42. 46 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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The authors of the New York Times–bestselling Sh*tty Mom are back with a hilarious guide presenting common parenting scenarios with advice for getting through the year the sh*tty mom way. Told in the same tongue-in-cheek voice as the original, this sequel is full of funny parenting tips and relatable stories for contemporary moms. Sh*tty Mom for All Seasons explores the occasions throughout the year that test every mother’s patience and inspire self-deprecating humor and that second glass of wine. With chapters organized by season, the book will teach you how to navigate the bumpy roads of motherhood, learn to laugh at the occasional parenting fail, and maybe even appreciate your own mother. Or not. Sample chapters for the sh*tty mom year include: Fall: “Yes, We All Have to Be Here: The Annual PTO Funsraiser” Winter: “Mom’s Real New Year’s Resolutions” Spring: “I’m Running Off with the Gardner: April Fools!” Summer: “Summer Reading Lists & Other Great Reasons Why You Don’t Home School” The Emmy Award–winning TODAY show producers and self-proclaimed sh*tty moms, Alicia Ybarbo and Mary Ann Zoellner, together with humorist Erin Clune, bring you the perfect book for mothers who don’t take themselves too seriously.

Out Of My Mind

Author : Sharon M. Draper
ISBN : 9781416971719
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 72. 49 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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Considered by many to be mentally retarded, a brilliant, impatient fifth-grader with cerebral palsy discovers a technological device that will allow her to speak for the first time.

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